The Importance of Being Busy.

So here I am, back in the land of blog. Again it's been a while for me, but life's been very hectic. And here's why.

1) University. Obviously a major part of my life, but right now I've just finished one assessment and I'm gearing up for three more. All due by week 12 (bearing in mind this is week 9...) Two practical assessments, one based on a Theatre in Education play and another based on eleven weeks of pretending to be a butterfly Grotowski, and an essay of 2,000 words based around the topic of how the city and identity can be linked and shown through theatre. This is code for having absolutely no idea what is going on at all.

2) Work. Now, with my poor financial planning, I'm always skint and forever looking forward to pay day. I also love my job and usually never complain about it. However, working at least 3 days a week since the end of Fresher's has definitely had a detrimental effect on my social life and a positive effect on my bank account. Having no time to breathe, think, write or socialise is a difficult way to exist, although I do enjoy working and generally being a social butterfly. I'm scared that I might actually have to ask for help (see my resolutions for more details) and ask if I can have my shifts cut down until the end of term... Insert sad face here.

3) Rehearsals. I am loving being in musical theatre again. I haven't been in a musical for several years and I so love the camaraderie and laughter that comes from being in a production. The downside of course is the amount of time and commitment that you have to have. I guess I'd just forgotten how much of yourself goes into a major production, and how much of what goes in actually does come out of you. But that said, I am actually having the time of my life!

As much as I may seem like a whiny whore in the above points, I'm really not. I'm just trying to illustrate why when you ask me to make plans, it takes me a couple of minutes to work out an appropriate day and time. Why when you ask me why I'm tired, I have a hundred different reasons to tell you but I smile and tell you it's the usual. Why when I say I miss my boyfriend, I'm not even kidding because when I do see him it feels like no time at all.


Background Blog: A particularly difficult choice this week. However, this song will forever make me think of my TIE/DIE assessment.

Blogging, or 2,000 Words Which Should Have Featured in my Essay.

I'm sure you're all clinging nervously onto the edge of your seats, fingernails picking the fabric of your sofas as you await my next enthralling update. Just what have I done?

Well then. Anniversary happened! Bet you're all glad to see the back of that one, it was all I could talk about for weeks. It was an amazing night with a great meal, fabulous service, a bit too much whisky and the artistry of my very lovely housemate Tess who made me look beautiful! Here is a picture of us looking happy and not drunk (yet).

Work has been happening! Whenever I feel tired, or low, or like a shift hasn't been great, I just remember that I'm putting away money for a holiday with two of my best girlfriends and then another with the handsome man in the above image. I haven't been abroad since Rob and I went to Bulgaria last summer, so I can't wait to have two holidays and see new parts of the world. I am especially looking forward to having a girl's holiday; I have never been abroad with friends. I have never had a true girl's holiday. And this is going to be the best thing since sliced bread, I can just feel it.

University has been happening! And it's very, very same-y at the moment. It's all assessments and difficult things and I don't like it. My toys are officially out of the pram. I don't want to end up failing everything and crying in a pool of gin, but I really do wish it could just be... easy.

That's it for me. Over and out!


Background Blog: My song of the moment. Not usually my style, but give it a go.

Just dropping by...

So I guess it's about time for a catch up. What's new, I hear the entire world cry. Well...

Today I found out I got a part in a musical (against all the odds, I might add). The musical is Hair, something I have never seen before and I should probably find out what it's all about. An ensemble part it is, but I'm really happy nonetheless. It's been a few years since I was last in a musical, and I'm so excited to be up and about again! I just hope I get put at the back for the dances, because I am not a talented dancer... Anyone fancy training me?

It is mine and Rob's anniversary on Monday. 2 whole years! I'm very excited to find out what he's got planned, it's all been a bit secret and I've not been allowed to know much. Can't wait for the surprises in store :).

I had the best homework from one of my lectures this week - to wander around Winchester and create my own personal guide around the city. At least, I think that was the point. That's what I've done anyway, and there's pictures on their way to illustrate my journey.

Must run and get ready for work now, so I'll put a background blog up later!

Update from the Leper Colony.

So today's the day. Second week of lectures and I've already had to email in sick.

I'd like to stress here that I AM ACTUALLY SICK. I'm not taking a sick day so that I can laze around watching television, or do some work that's overdue. I'm sick. Our whole house is sick. Our living room is a sea of tissues and is set thick with the stench of death rhinovirus. It is, in the words of my boyfriend, not ideal.

I hate being sick. There's nothing worse than coughing up phlegm, having an eternally blocked nose, shivering  under multiple blankets and every possible part of your body aching. Add in the fact that I didn't have a particularly great night at work last night and I got caught in a ridiculous downpour, I feel like Satan's faeces right about now. As much as I want to find something healthy and delicious to eat, I'm so lethargic that the best I have managed so far is some chocolate and now some SuperNoodles. I'll probably die of malnutrition before the cold, but I cannot bring myself to make anything nutritious. I am currently watching Jeremy Kyle and feeling my bones rattle under my duvet. Not really what I wanted from my day.

In other news, my two year anniversary with Rob is creeping up faster and faster. I'm very excited! He's treating me to lots of little surprises that I know nothing about as well as some I do, and it's just like when we first got together. He always surprises me with little things like my favourite dessert or a funny little gift, and I love that, but somehow the excitement of going out to dinner in a new place takes me back two years to when I would have been lost without him. Even if I lost him now, I still don't know what I'd do.

I think this is all of my musings. Perhaps I'll post again soon, but hopefully I'll be feeling better.

Background Blog: One of my favourite, yet underrated, Kate Bush songs.

Aims.

So I'm just under a week into my first week of lectures. Here's a few aims I have for this year, and as they're out in the public eye then hopefully I'll be motivated to keep to them!



1. Get a First in something. I'd like for it to be in Applied Drama or TIE/DIE and Children's Theatre, but getting one in anything is my main aim.

2. Attend all my lectures. Last year I missed two or three out of illness, and then slept through a few after I started working. This will not happen this year! I will be awake!!

3. Try my absolute hardest in all my lectures. I was working at about 75% last year, and I am determined to get to 90%! (Not 100%, I'll need that for my FYP.)

4. Keep my friends and appreciate them more. I don't want to wake up in the middle of semester two and realise all my friends hate me because I've never been there. I am a good friend and I know I am.

5. Keep on top of the house work. A lame one, I know, but I need to make sure that the house is beautiful and sparkly for all the friends I will be keeping to come and see!

6. Budget better. I refuse to spend all my money on things I don't actually need. It's not necessary, I'm just an impulse spender, and I'm shit. I work hard for my money. I should put it towards things I want and deserve. Like holidays and buzzing nights out.

7. Eat well and be healthy. So many people have noticed that I lost weight over summer, the last thing I want is to pile it back on through too many Domino's or one pint of purple I could have swapped for water. Fresh fruit is going to be a key component, and I must cut down on my snacking!!

8. See my boyfriend as much as I can. The last two weeks have been difficult, what with work and Fresher's Crew and the start of my lectures. But I don't want us to grow apart, because he's been the one thing in my life the last two years that has never changed, or doubted me, or said a harsh word. He's absolutely fabulous.

9. Be true to myself. Don't take anyone's shit, brush off what I don't need and make sure that I stand up for what I believe in. My biggest trouble is asking for help when I need it; and this year, I want to do it right.

10. Enjoy myself. Life is for the living, and we're a long time dead.



Background Blog: To always remind myself that I am who I am and I'll do what I want. Also a fantastic throwback to my youth.

Crazy Days in a Summer Haze.

So I've been so busy recently! Fresher's at Winchester has officially kicked off and my days have been a blur of training for Fresher's Crew and FOH, which has had upsides and downsides. It has meant that I haven't been able to relax and ease into the lifestyle again as much as last year, but equally I've been able to watch a whole new bunch of nervous, excited kids enjoy their first night out as university students. Not that it was without drama of course, but isn't that what being a Fresher is all about?

My personal life is also taking a pretty exciting route. On September 20th 2012, it will have been two years to the day that I met my handsome, intelligent, adorable boyfriend. Yes, I can never use too many adjectives, but also I am probably the luckiest girl in the world. He always knows how to make me smile, he's probably way too good to/for me, his cooking is better than anything ever and most importantly when I'm in his arms I feel complete. This is a pretty big achievement for me because I went through a pretty wild phase in my life where it looked like I'd never settle down and that I was doomed to have one night stands until I lost my looks and then become a crazy old spinster who drank whisky and chewed tobacco. When everyone tells you something, it's hard to believe that you could be anything else. And then when I least expected it, I met him and everything changed. I know I have friends who think that my no longer being a single girl makes me boring or that I'm not the same person as I used to be - to which I point out that of course I'm not! I've learned to make someone else happy, to compromise, to take a back seat sometimes and most importantly I've learned how to be happy.

Background Blog: The song of this year's Fresher's, of course!!

May Contain Scenes Viewers Could Find Depressing.

So my first love decides to fly back into the country.

It's about 4 years since we last spoke, and he told me pretty abruptly that he was moving to Australia one day. Then I never really heard from him again, apart from awkward five sentence conversations on Facebook. Never even a happy birthday. Now he's back, and it's all over Facebook, and he's brought a woman. One of many from what I can gather.

I feel so strange. I'm hurt because he never told me he was coming back, shocked that I feel this way, scared that something bad could happen even though it probably won't. I felt sick to my stomach when I saw it, but it seems to be easing slightly now. If only he hadn't been such a Grade A Dick I probably wouldn't be all that bothered. But I really did love him. And then he left. And I blame him for everything now.

This isn't a particularly cohesive post, and I see that. It's one of those weird stream of consciousness things that they taught you about in your A levels in my day. But I think the point that I'm really trying to get to is this:

I don't understand your reasons. I don't understand what you said. I don't understand why you hurt me without a second thought. I don't understand why you lied to me and told me you felt the same.

Background Blog: This was a difficult one to work out. A lot of ideas went around my head because I am a lover of heartbroken songs and balladry. So I decided to choose two.

People These Days.

I know, I know. I promised I'd never really be on here, and here I am posting twice in one day. I'm sorry. But this is something that really niggled me earlier and I wanted to know if anybody else finds this really annoying.

I took it upon myself to walk to the corner shop after realising I had no cigarettes, food, or any sort of sustenance. Whilst on my way, I encountered several members of the public on what is quite a narrow pathway. Each time I gave way to the person in front of me, standing in the road, on the verge, in driveways and at one point in the path of a determined-looking 60 something cyclist who I genuinely believe would have run me over if I hadn't moved at the moment I did. Out of all of these interactions, only the man with a pram acknowledged me with a mumbled thank you and a small smile.

So when did it become okay not to thank people for acts of kindness I wonder? I make a point of smiling, acknowledging and maybe even engaging in conversation with anybody who so much as moves their trolley out of the way for me in the supermarket. People ought to think about these things. What if that simple nod of thanks made a person see the good in humanity again? Or made them feel that they were worth something when they were at their lowest ebb?

I like to think that this is just a temporary lull in people's general good manners and that one day we can all learn to say 'please' and 'thank you' again. If you feel the same, I think we should organise a club for the disgruntled.



Background Blog: Apologies for the bad joke, but so worth it.

The Often Unimpressive Inaugural Blog Post.

Well this is definitely my millionth attempt at a blog. I'll make no promises, I probably won't post every day or every week. Many things I say may or may not be very interesting. I'm hideously technologically inhibited, so there won't be many pictures or shit like that. And I'll probably swear a lot.

But the grammar and spelling will be good so don't worry too much :).




A Few Facts About Me, Myself & I:


1) My birthday is November 28th, making me a Sagittarius. I will be twenty... something, and I like cards. (Not a hint, but y'know...)

2) Pickle is the name my boyfriend gave me, but Stephanie is the real one.

3) I'm a Drama student and I'm aiming to be a practising Dramatherapist within 5 years. Challenge accepted!

4) I believe in God. I won't try to convert you, but just that I know He is there.

5) I like lots and lots of music. I am heavily influenced by it. My favourite artist ever is probably Kate Bush (check her out here).

6) I like quoting lyrics, actors, musicians, politicians etc as much as I can. I'm not sure whether this is due to me trying to look hip or whether I actually talk like that, but it can probably seem quite pretentious.

7) A lot of people think I am loud. I am not loud. I am hyper-expressive. The bigger, crazier, bolder and ridiculous(er) the better! If I have something to say, I want to say it loud and proud. I'm an extrovert and I love making a splash with my thoughts and opinions. This is probably why I enjoy theatre so much.

8) I have an autistic brother. I am very passionate about finding ways to help people who suffer from similar conditions and perhaps one day finding a cure. If you are like-minded, or are interested in finding out more, feel free to get in touch!

9) Despite being an avid writer, I really hate writing about myself. I prefer to write about things that happen to other people, or be one of those annoyingly vague people who writes pointed statements without ever manning up and saying who it is I'm actually talking about. I will endeavour to change all of this and be 100% honest with everyone. If I'm not then I'm only letting myself down, right?

10) I'm a Winchester Student Union employee, but all the opinions and any other junk on here does not represent the Union. Just me. Enjoy :).




My Background Blog: This is an idea I came up with to potentially show people what I'm into and maybe get them involved too. Listen to it before/during/after reading. Here's the first!